The time is always right...

No more tug of war

One thing that I'm finally learning is to walk away from the tug of war.

You want someone to do something and so you pull with all of your might.
The person looks you deep in the eyes from across the pit of mud, holding onto the other end of the rope.

Just write.

Seth Godin is a business/marketing guru and I subscribe to his blog. Today's post stuck with me and I'm going to try a little harder to write every single day.

Out of the cold, into the dark (Maui, Day 1)

I barely snuck past the icy blanket that threatened to cover New York City and mess with my plans this week. But I got out. I barely got out and about sixteen hours later, I'm in Makawao, Maui.

It is really dark here.

My very own Rosh Hashanah

by' Jen Chau

Now, if you don't know me well, you might be wondering why I am writing about Rosh Hashanah. If you do know me well, then you know that my mom is Jewish. That I am Jewish. I am not religious and never have been. Still, a lot of Jewish holidays and traditions are meaningful to me. I grew up with them and they hold feelings of love and family for me. I am what you would call a "high holiday Jew." And even that's being a little generous. Past experiences of exclusion have left me feeling quite distanced from the Jewish community. That...

...and then there was Rita's passing...

You can't take the New York City out of the girl...

by Jen Chau

 ...so what happens when you take the girl out of New York City?

I have always been a die-hard New Yorker. Was born here, raised here, have lived my whole life here...aside from the four years that I lived on the Wellesley College campus amongst lakes and geese. Had to get right back to the pavement and shade-less streets! I am the type of person who has a visceral reaction upon re-entry to the Big Apple. If I'm away, I am absolutely ecstatic to come home. Goosebumps spread across my body as the warm city air hits my face or as I catch my first glimpse of the Empire State building's shining lights in the night sky. I have never seriously considered living anywhere else because New York makes me happy, through and through. I even love riding the subway with all of its stinky-ness (literally and attitudinally). :) I love being around lots of people. I love the activity and the energy of New York. I have always been in love with this city.

Relax with purpose!

by Jen Chau

What do you get when you have a workaholic who abruptly agrees to change? Most likely, a workaholic, still. :) Or at least, that's what happened to me.

Most likely, the most serious strain of workaholic has literally lost herself. She may have known herself at one time, but depending on how early the workaholic tendencies set in (mine started in high school), she may not know herself at all. So, when the workaholic decides, "you know what? I'm going to try to relax!" She literally doesn't have a clue what to do. She doesn't know what she'd rather be doing than working. Her identity is wrapped up in, and is given meaning by work. Sure, this is admirable, but how sustainable? And how happy is the workaholic really? I don't want to try and make assessments on anyone else's life - so I will focus on me. I wasn't actually happy and very rarely relaxed. So I set off to cut back and cut up.

Resolution 2010: One thing at a time.

by Jen Chau

I've been at my local Queens cafe for a couple of hours now. My butt is falling asleep thanks to the utilitarian dark wood beneath me. It's raining outside and the reflection of headlights and stoplights smear red and white streaks against wet asphalt. I don't think I ever noticed the simple beauty of drops falling into pools of rain at each dipped street corner. Or the choreographed tilt of umbrellas in unison, as wind pushes up against a line of people walking up and down the same sidewalk. A few drops smack into the cafe window right by my face and I follow them down with my eyes as they zig zag between other existing droplets of water stuck where they are. It's just another rainy day, and at the same time, a completely new experience.

Take it from me...live an a-ha rich life!

by Jen Chau

I was never one for shoving things down people's throats. Nor do I presume to be wiser than my years. You know what I've done (and if you don't, you can look here), and those experiences are the things from which I draw my understandings of the world. I don't know any more or any less at the moment. But I always...I always hope to know and work to know more tomorrow than I did today. With that in mind, I like to think that other people also arrange their lives in such a fashion -- with a commitment to self-improvement and ongoing learning. If so, I will ask you to "take it from me" from time to time, when I feel strongly enough that I want to offer a learning that I have had. As I said before, I don't aim to convince anyone to change based on any of what I say. BUT I highly value the idea of people offering others tools and resources so that they may be empowered to live richer and fuller lives. If I can somehow spark/inspire learning for anyone else (the way that others have done for me), then I will be satisfied with my modest efforts.

Congratulations, Head! I am giving you a promotion!

by Jen Chau

Now listen, Head. I know that you've been with this company for a long time -- 30 years. You've been able to go with the flow and have been a loyal employee, but the truth is that you haven't really been much of a leader. I know that I also haven't pushed you in this way. I realize now that I have spent the majority of my time nurturing and developing Heart, but I am committed to making some changes to ensure that this operation runs in a better way. I have begun to realize how we will soon fall short of our goals if we continue on this path of allowing Heart to run with things, unchecked. Let's be honest. Heart has overpowered you...

Note to my ego: You better watch your damn back.

by Jen Chau

I have been losing to my ego for years. And the scary thing is, I never realized it before today. In boxing (my exercise obsession for the last two years), you know who your opponent is. No doubt about it. He is standing before you, punching and jabbing and swinging. Weaving and sweating and bleeding all over you. It’s obvious and unmistakable, and you know what you have to do. Land him before he lands you. You know who you are fighting.